Magnetic Attitude

This is a review of “Sing It - Rebecca Black - Official Music Video”

- In her newest song (still without an album, what up with that?) Ms. Black tries to give us a summer hit, but it can’t top the unintentional summer hit of Friday. Her sound improves. Her lyrics don’t.

- Immediately, “Fuck you, I live near this awesome private beach and you don’t. This is my moment!”

- I like the moment when Ms. Black takes a bunch of sea water in her hands and blows it like soap bubbles. Except they go nowhere and Ms. Black gets soaking wet. What did you expect, Rebecca?

- Does she know that the Sun is 93 million miles away? And she says she could walk, “a million, BILLION miles?” Let’s test that theory, Becca.

- You get out of her way when Bec is dreaming, okay? 

- In every one of Becca-Boo’s videos, she does an impromptu performance for her friends. If I was her friend, I would just get fed up. “Rebecca, we all know you want to sing. Let’s just hang out. I’m tired of you singing.”

- “Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.”

- Next song has to be a ballad, right? MAKE ME CRY, REBECCA.

5/10

This is a review of “Justin Bieber - Boyfriend”

Preface: I do not know how to spell Bieber, so I will not edit or change any of my spellings from now on. Prepare for a lot of Beibers, Bievers, and Beivers.

- Just like most music videos from today, I don’t get it (see: “Call Me Maybe” review). So Justin Beiber goes on The Voice, shows the fake first thirty seconds of his video only to pull the rug out of anyone who cares. I don’t get it. I kind of like the fake video better. It fits the “cool” theme of the song. Unlike the bowling alley anthem of “Baby,” this song deserves to be set in a weird ice kingdom with weird jewelry and frozen donkey wheels (OBSURE LOST REFERENCE FOR YA).

- Second, its not like the two parts are any different. Douche Justin Biever sings to the camera/his masses, fake-plays the guitar, while attractive women probably eight years his senior grind on him while throwing up in their mouths. I DON’T SEE A DIFFERENCE.

- Also, these car/leather heads would not listen to Douche Justin Biever sing and play his guitar for what seems like hours. THE SUN SETS AND HE IS STILL PLAYING. Don’t your fingers get tired? Oh wait. They have been hardened by the Canadian winter. My bad.

- Okay, Douche Justin Biber wears his influences on his sleeve harder than Metta World Peace punches unsuspecting NBA players. Song: Timberlake. Video: Otis. Expensive sport cars doing donuts for no reason. Weird bracelets. Only thing missing is Aziz. WHERE YOU AT?

- Then, at the end, throw in some terrible group dancing. End of video. Good try Douche Justin Biever.

4/10

Season 3 is about the price that you pay when you figure out that you love a group of people. That’s it in a nutshell. It’s about the high cost of valuing people other than yourself, and that’s the path that Jeff has been on. The third chapter for him is going to be the toughest of all. When you love people, their pain is your pain. Nobody’s going to have to deal with more this year than Jeff Winger.

—Dan Harmon (via eyes-as-candies)

(Source: surelybennett, via communitythings)

I’m not the biggest fan of Tune-Yards, but like an Andrew Bird or Owen Pallett concert, its always cool to see someone build a song in front of you. Plus long noodly sax solos are awesome.